Mark Sanford, the Governor of South Carolina, disappeared late last week. Fell off the radar screen. As it turned out, he says he was spending a few days hiking on the Appalachian Trail. Hmmm.
For days, news outlets everywhere speculated feverishly on his whereabouts. According to the reports, even his wife had no idea where he was. The facts according to ABC News:
Where is South Carolina’s governor?
The lieutenant governor doesn’t know. Even Gov. Mark Sanford’s wife is in the dark.
“He was writing something and wanted some space to get away from the kids,” Jenny Sanford told The Associated Press while vacationing with the couple’s four sons at their Sullivans Island beach house. She said she didn’t know where he was, but wasn’t concerned.
Sanford always seemed like an odd duck to me. If I had to name a governor who would disappear, he would be my man.
It’s exceedingly curious for a public figure to drop out of sight, especially when the wife doesn’t know where the guy is. After all, hiking the AT is a fairly noteworthy activity. Nor is it complicated to explain.
While he was gone, I did my own speculating about where he was and why he went there…
Had he gone away to rest, think, or decompress? Was he writing his memoirs? Attending a seminar?
Marathon poker game with the guys?
Was he on a road trip? In rehab? On a bender?
Delivering a car to the West Coast?
Having a sex change operation? Visiting his home planet?
To my discredit, hiking on the AT didn’t occur to me.
When I first read about the missing governor, the term French leave came to mind.
I understood French leave to mean the act of taking off without telling anybody. But just to be sure, I looked it up.
Sure enough, it means “A leave of absence without permission or without announcing one’s departure.”
I also learned that in French, the phrase is, “Filer a’ l’anglaise.”
Translation: English leave.
I don’t know who’s more entertaining, Governor Sanford or those madcap Frenchies.
The elusive Governor Sanford.
Madcap Frenchies.
Mr. Write's Page 
Also, to your discredit you failed to assume the most obvious. He was visiting a “lady friend”.
Doh!
Maybe he was hiking the AT with a “madcap Frenchie lady friend”….
Perhaps he went for a hike and came across Cletus and his pot field.
Wow. Tim wins the prize, apparently. Did he think no one would notice that he left the country?