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Posts Tagged ‘Miscellaneous’

TAMPA, FLORIDA — A Tampa contractor claims in a lawsuit that he entered a condominium to conduct a fire safety inspection and was attacked by a bobcat.

The contractor claims that the bobcat was illegally-kept and unrestrained and inflicted permanent injuries. He asks for a jury trial and unspecified damages.

According to the condo owner, the contractor entered the apartment illegally because he wasn’t accompanied by a building employee as the bylaws require. Furthermore, she said she owns a small domestic longhair cat, not a bobcat.

A Florida wildlife official went to the condo and was introduced to Calli, a 10-pound housecat with a tortoise-shell-colored coat. The official’s report concluded that Calli is not a bobcat, inasmuch as bobcats are larger animals with light-colored, spotted coats, tufted ears, and bobbed tails.

The contractor’s attorney declined to comment.

Calli

MINOT, NORTH DAKOTA — Employees at a Hobby Lobby store called 911 last month to report that a white male was fleeing the store pushing a shopping cart loaded with stolen merchandise.

When police arrived, they found the shopping cart in the parking lot, lying on its side in deep snow. It contained about $4,000 worth of stolen items. Employees said the man tripped and fell, the cart overturned, and he fled on foot.

While inspecting the scene, officers found a wallet that contained photo identification and an address. A 22-year-old man who resided there was arrested on felony shoplifting charges.

Shoplifter

BOWMANSTOWN, PENNSYLVANIA — As family members watched in horror, their small pet dog was snatched from the back yard and carried away by an eagle.

Zoey, an eight-pound Bichon Frise, was playing in the yard when the eagle swooped down, grabbed her in its talons, and soared away. The distraught owners began a fruitless search of the area.

About two hours later and four miles away, a woman found a dazed Zoey lying on the ground and took her home. After reading a Facebook post about the incident, the woman returned Zoey to her family.

Zoey has a slight limp, but apparently was otherwise unharmed, although the owners say she is hesitant to leave the house. No one knows how she escaped from the eagle.

Zoey

 

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decalninja_colortemplate

Always

Adults

Deport

 

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The late William Safire was a New York Times columnist and Nixon speechwriter who called himself a “libertarian conservative.” Clearly, Safire was not on my wavelength, because I think libertarians are naive and conservatives are selfish and mean.

But we were sympatico in one respect. In spite of Safire’s noxious politics, he was an expert wordsmith and devoted etymologist. I like that in a person.

From 1979 until his death, Safire wrote the weekly column “On Language” in the New York Times Magazine. During those 30 years, he wrote over 1300 columns about words, word origins, meanings, usage, and the evolution of language.

In particular, Safire is known for his list of “fumblerules.” He defined a fumblerule as a rule of language, humorously written in a way that breaks the rule itself. A masterful way to make the point with clarity.

Here is a list of Safire’s fumblerules. Some were published in his weekly column, others in his book “Fumblerules: A Lighthearted Guide to Grammar and Good Usage.”

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1. Remember to never split an infinitive.

2. A preposition is something never to end a sentence with.

3. The passive voice should never be used.

4. Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read.

5. Don’t use no double negatives.

6. Use the semicolon properly, always use it where it is appropriate; and never where it isn’t.

7. Reserve the apostrophe for it’s proper use and omit it when its not needed.

8. Do not put statements in the negative form.

9. Verbs have to agree with their subjects.

10. No sentence fragments.

11. Proofread carefully to see if you words out.

12. Avoid commas, that are not necessary.

13. If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.

14. A writer must not shift your point of view.

15. Eschew dialect, irregardless.

16. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.

17. Don’t overuse exclamation marks!!!

18. Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.

19. Always hyphenate between syllables and avoid un-necessary hy-

phens.

20. Write all adverbial forms correct.

21. Don’t use contractions in formal writing.

22. Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.

23. It is incumbent on us to avoid archaisms.

24. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.

25. Steer clear of incorrect forms of verbs that have snuck in the language.

26. Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.

27. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.

28. Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

29. Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.

30. If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, resist hyperbole.

31. Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.

32. Don’t string too many prepositional phrases together unless you are walking through the valley of the shadow of death.

33. Always pick on the correct idiom.

34. “Avoid overuse of ‘quotation “marks.”‘”

35. The adverb always follows the verb.

36. Last but not least, avoid clichés like the plague; they’re old hat; seek viable alternatives.

37. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.

38. Employ the vernacular.

39. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

40. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.

41. Contractions aren’t necessary.

42. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

43. One should never generalize.

44. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”

45. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.

46. Don’t be redundant; don’t use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.

47. Be more or less specific.

48. Understatement is always best.

49. One-word sentences? Eliminate.

50. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

51. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

52. Who needs rhetorical questions?

53. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

54. capitalize every sentence and remember always end it with a point

Safire W

William Lewis Safire (1929-2009)

 

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Useless Facts

— In 1804, when President Thomas Jefferson dispatched the Lewis and Clark expedition to explore the Louisiana Purchase, he instructed the men to be on the lookout for woolly mammoths and giant ground sloths. In Jefferson’s day, extinction was a fuzzy concept.

— The television network C-SPAN was created in 1979 by the cable TV industry as a public service. C-SPAN is an acronym for Cable-Satellite Public Affairs Network.

— Eric Clapton is the only musician elected to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame three times. He was inducted in 1992 as a member of The Yardbirds, in 1993 as a member of Cream, and in 2000 as a solo performer.

— The resting heart rate of a hummingbird is about 250 beats per minute. (In adult humans, the rate is 75-80 beats per minute.) When a hummingbird is in flight, the rate can increase to 1,200 beats per minute.

Hummingbird wings do not flap. They rotate in a full circle, at up to 70 rotations per second.

Hummingbird

The French equivalent of the acronym “LOL” (laughing out loud) is “MDR,” which means “mort de rire” (dying of laughter).

— The British Museum in London, usually considered the largest and most comprehensive in the world, houses a vast collection that documents the entirety of human culture. Over 230 million objects are preserved by the institution, and its website hosts the world’s largest online museum database.

— In 1957, two business partners in New Jersey tried to develop a new type of wallpaper by sealing two shower curtains together. The idea proved impractical, but the material they created was ideal for protecting products in shipment. Their company still manufactures a wide range of Bubble Wrap® products today.

— The first known e-commerce transaction, in which an online buyer used a credit card protected by encryption technology, occurred on August 11, 1994. On that date, the website NetMarket, operated by a 21-year-old entrepreneur from New Hampshire, sold a Sting CD to a buyer in Philadelphia for $12.48 plus shipping.

Sting CD

— Between 1964 and 1966, The Beatles visited the U.S. four times and performed 56 live concerts. At each concert, the band’s legal contract stipulated that they would not perform before a racially segregated audience.

— Sixteen percent of the population suffers from trypophobia, the fear of clusters of irregular holes, such as those found in sponges and honeycombs.

— The record for the world’s tallest known man is held by Robert Wadlow (1918-1940) of Alton, Illinois. His height was verified as 8 feet, 11.1 inches. The title of the world’s tallest known woman is held by Zeng Jinlian (1964-1982) of Hunan, China. She was 8 feet, 1.75 inches tall.

— The scarlet jellyfish, a small species found in the Pacific Ocean and the Mediterranean Sea, has the unique ability to rejuvenate itself rather than die. When old, sick, or stressed, it can revert to its polyp stage and basically start its life over. Theoretically, this process can go on indefinitely, making the animal biologically immortal. In nature, however, they eventually succumb to disease or predation.

Scarlet jellyfish

 

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There is nothing more sublime that is so readily accessible as the natural world.

— Leslie T. Sharpe

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All the people like us are We, and everyone else is They.

— Rudyard Kipling

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We do not remember days, we remember moments.

— Cesare Pavese

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I do not pretend to understand the moral universe; the arc is a long one, my eye reaches but little ways; I cannot calculate the curve and complete the figure by the experience of sight; I can divine it by conscience. And from what I see, I am sure it bends towards justice.

— Theodore Parker

Sharpe LT

Sharpe

Parker T

Parker

 

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Pix o’ the Day

More random photos I’ve taken over the years that still make me smile.

Easter egg

Mannequins-2

Shredded

Budweiser

Carry

 

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Life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you react to it.

— Charles R. Swindoll

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The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser men so full of doubts.

— Bertrand Russell

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Try to learn something about everything and everything about something.

— Thomas Henry Huxley

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An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed.

— A. J. Liebling

Swindoll CR

Swindoll

Liebling AJ

Liebling

 

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